Time Warner Cable - Digital Turd in a punch bowl
Received this email from one of their sales minions:
Good morning Mike,
Sorry to bother you. Can you please let me know who handles your voice and data services, internally, and how I might get in touch with them?
Time Warner Cable - Business Class
Here's my response. I hope it helps some of you find closure. (It won't but I hope it does.)
Good morning Moises!
Let’s see…. You’re asking if I can point you to the right person to discuss TWC business class services.
This question after;
1. Your contracted personnel who make appointments and not show up 3 times stating that “no one was at the business or home” when we clearly had personnel there, only to have to wait for 7 more days for the *** to call back and ask for directions to the locations that he “supposedly” showed up at. You see the crack in the logic, right?
2. A simple transfer of service request from one location to another, only to receive an email explaining that services were due to be disconnected in 24 hours for non-payment after the online payment was clearly made. What was the problem? TWC didn’t transfer the service. They opened a new account at the new location and associated the login account to the old location that was SUPPOSED to be transferred (Transfer = Close location 1, Open location 2). (Wait till you read item three below. This is where it gets good.)
3. After receiving the email, I attempt to log on to my account. “Login No Longer Available”. Apparently, TWC locks the ability to log in when bills aren’t paid. Now, this presents a problem. Why? Because you guys are pushing the “green” solution and asking everyone to go paperless. Well, that’s awesome but how do you get to your account if you’re paperless and you lock out your customer’s ability to actually log in to see what’s going on? I can hear what you’re thinking; “But you get an email”. No, no I didn’t. Now what. Nothing. That’s what.
4. According to my login (before it was killed), the account was fully paid. But that’s not the one you guys were talking about. You guys were talking about a new account that I was completely unaware of. How would you pay that bill? Call David Copperfield to “will” it paid? No, what you have your customers do is call and get in a *** that makes the DMV look like the boarding process for a private flight. After all said and done, I had to pay for two accounts totaling $843.26. Hopefully your highly skilled workforce followed through with their promise to close the old location. If not, go enjoy the internet and cable. I’m *** sure not paying for it. And if it ever even passes through and clips my credit report, I’ll be all over you people. I’ve got proof of a transfer request and proof that I got double billed. No problem… until you try me again. And my corporate office happens to be right across the street from the TWC corporate office. (Check your global log and look up the street name “”.) I’ve got no problem walking over there and dealing with another screw up.
5. Come up with better phrases when you’re dealing with the ever increasing line of pissed customers. “I’m sorry for your inconvenience. I understand. I’m doing all I can. No, the closest time I can get the next lying, cost-saving, low budget contractor to make the empty promise of showing up again is a week from next Tuesday. I understand. I know you said that you were there but my “technician” said you were not so he went to the next call.” I guess what I am saying is spin a lie that is believable. I’m not asking for follow through or pushing serious issues upstream to someone that depends on bonuses based on new business revenue. Just lie better. When I asked if the scenario were reversed and if it would be OK if I told you I would send a payment and decided not to but told you I'd send a payment next week and that there would be nothing I could do about it but I would certainly understand your frustration, you said "No I'm sorry, we wouldn't be able to facilitate that." Me either, ***.
I get it. You’re not the one that did this. You’re the one that works for the company that did this… MAYBE. Maybe you’re a call center guy on contract to pull more business in. I’d hate to be you. It’s becoming more and more of a hard sell Moises. There’s three kinds of sales efforts really. One, sales for quality merchandise and/or services, Two, cold call sales and Three, sales for poorly received merchandise and/or services. Left to me? I’d rather be knocking on doors trying to sell dead parrots than trying to squeeze another nickel out of companies or people for a service as poorly managed and horrendously received by the general public as you’re trying to sell. Good luck. Seriously, the executive that decided to use contract labor for their service technicians should be sharing a cell with Bernie Madoff. And if I were on the board of directors for TWC, he would be. The “technician” in the field forms your customer’s opinion of the company you work for and directly affects the ability of others (like you) to build more business and make a living.
That said, I can’t stand people that complain and not have any solutions. So let me offer TWC a mitigation strategy. Hire homeless people, give them a tool belt, spot them a few filters, a road map and a “pay as you go” cell phone. I’ll trust that guy over what you currently use. He’ll show up. Not because he can actually fix anything but because there may be a meal in it. Same result but at least someone shows up. If he brings the filter, gives me his contractor code and a dial in phone number, I’ll get the *** service going myself while he eats. Far better solution than some *** trying to get home early so he can tip back a few beers before his old lady gets home at my cost.
Now.. back to your question about pointing you to the right person to discuss TWC business class services. Tell you what. I’ll have someone drop by your office on April 1, 2015 between the hours of 8AM and 5PM. Make sure someone is in the office. If they aren’t (or at least my technician says they aren’t) then I’ll need to go ahead and send him to the next call. I’ll understand your frustration but there really is nothing I will be able to do at that point but reschedule you for another lesson in futility.
Director IT Services
Review about: Cable Service Transfer.
I didn't like: Very poor customer service.
Review #609902 is a subjective opinion of a user.